What If You Ditched the To Do List

Why are we always chasing a to-do list?

I think about this often. Where does the to-do list even come from? Who created it?

On the surface, it looks like a good idea, right? It keeps us organized. It keeps us on task. It reminds us of everything we want to accomplish.

All of that is true. But let's dive a little deeper.

If we really get to the root, a to-do list is just a construct that society created to support productivity. And productivity matters because we are trained to always keep moving, keep accomplishing, stay busy. From a young age, we are shown that getting things done and staying active will get us into a good college, which will translate into a good career.

We wear busyness like a badge of honor. We accomplish something and move straight onto the next pending task — because let's face it, there is always something more to do.

Now, to-do lists are not the enemy. And honestly, I have one. But mine comes with a twist.

I also keep an accomplished list.

It is an idea I came across in a book called Meditation for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman. What if I asked you to list everything you accomplished today? How many of you would only write down work-related items? But what if we added the personal ones too?

Things like:

I made coffee. I got my child off to school. I made breakfast with the intention of nourishing myself. I took a deep breath before work. I stood in the sun. I moved my body. I went for a walk with intention.

I bet if you listed everything you did in a day, it would fill an entire page.

I remember the first time I tried this myself. I sat down at the end of a day that felt completely unproductive, like I had not really checked anything off my list. And when I actually wrote down everything I had done, I was stunned. Not because it was extraordinary. But because I had done so much and didn’t give myself credit for any of it.

That was the moment this practice became non-negotiable for me.

Because the truth is, we do a lot. And when we take a moment to genuinely appreciate and congratulate ourselves, we are living in gratitude. We are seeing the abundance. We are witnessing our own strength.

With that shift, the world begins to open up. Because we are training our brain to look for the good, for the positive. Not gaslighting ourselves into endless optimism, but chemically changing our brain to recognize and seek out the small moments of ease, of lightness, of love.

And here is what most people do not realize: this is not just a mindset practice. When we shift our focus from what we did not do to what we did, we are sending a signal of safety to our nervous system. We are telling our body that we are enough, that we did enough, that we are not in danger. And when the nervous system feels safe, everything softens. The anxiety quiets. The grip loosens. The constant urgency begins to ease.

That is the real work.

Because when things do go amiss, we have the courage to acknowledge it, sit with the feeling, and fully love and accept ourselves anyway.

Day over day, this practice lets us see how the small micro moments I keep talking about are actually shaping our lives and changing our reality. You can feel their impact when you stop and take note of everything it took to get you here today.

This week, I want you to try it. At the end of each day, write your accomplished list. Not what you did not finish. Not what is still pending. Just what you did. All of it. And then sit with that for a moment.

You might be surprised by who you find there.

And if something comes up, I would love to hear what you notice. Reply back and tell me. You might just inspire the next newsletter.

If you want to discuss how to implement these practices in your day-to-day, let’s chat. Schedule a free 30-minute call here.

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